What is a letter of wishes?
A letter of wishes is an informal, personal document that sits alongside your Will. It doesn’t divide your money or property. That’s what the Will is for. Instead, it captures everything the Will can’t: your funeral preferences, the reasons behind your decisions, care instructions for your pets, guidance about your online accounts, and private messages to the people you love.
How is it different from a Will?
Your Will is a formal, legally binding document. It says who receives what, names your executors, and must follow strict legal rules. A letter of wishes is the opposite: it’s flexible, personal, and not legally binding. That’s exactly what makes it useful: you can be warm, honest and specific in a way a Will simply can’t be.
The two work as a pair. The Will handles the law; the letter handles the human side.
Why write one?
- It prevents conflict. Explaining why you made a decision can stop hurt feelings and family disputes later.
- It removes guesswork. Your family won’t have to agonise over what you would have wanted for your funeral or your belongings.
- It protects what matters. The story behind a treasured object, or a final message, is preserved in your own words.
What should it include?
- Funeral and farewell preferences
- The reasons behind how things are shared
- Specific and sentimental gifts, and who they’re for
- Care instructions for pets
- Guidance on digital accounts and subscriptions
- Practical details: where documents, keys and contacts are
- Personal messages to family and friends
How do I write one?
You can start with a blank document, but most people find that daunting and never finish. Our free guided tool asks you the right questions in a calm order, then shapes your answers into a clear letter you can print and keep with your Will.
Is this legal advice?
No. This guide and tool are here to help you organise and express your wishes. A letter of wishes does not replace a Will, and nothing here is legal advice. For your Will and your specific circumstances, please speak to a qualified solicitor.